Dark Écriture(Done)

View previous topic View next topic Go down

Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tenjin on Mon Sep 29, 2014 4:17 pm

Spell name: Sharp Rune
Element: N/A
Rank: 1
MP cost: 10MP(5MP Sustained)
Effect: By writing the "sharp" rune on an object(such as Tenjin's wooden sword), she imbues the object with the sharpness of any sword or edge. The object becomes sharp and capable of piercing objects and barriers equal to the amount of stars spent.

Power:**
Speed:
Area:
Extra:*(Piercing)*(Sustained)


Spell name: Pain Rune
Element: N/A
Rank: 1
MP cost: 10MP
Effect: By writing the "pain" rune on an object(Such as Tenjin's wooden sword) and strikes or simply touches a foe with it, they feel excruciating pain. The pain is not physical but mental; it's intent is to chastise and weaken the foe's mind in battle.

Power:*
Speed:
Area:
Extra:*(Enchantment) **(Lingering)


Spell name: Fear Rune
Element: N/A
Rank: 1
MP cost: 10MP
Effect: By writing the rune "Fear" on an object(Such as Tenjin's wooden sword) or another person, the affected person is attacked by waves of fear. A person with equal or lower willpower(Power VS Willpower) will be more easily affected by this rune.

Power:**
Speed:
Area:
Extra:*(Enchantment)*(Lingering)


Spell name: Reflect Rune
Element: N/A
Rank: 1
MP cost: 10MP
Effect: By writing the rune "reflect" on an object(Such as Tenjin's wooden sword) or in the air, a transparent shield will appear around the caster. It will defend the caster and reflect the attack back to the foe.

Power:+**(Defending)
Speed:
Area:
Extra:*(Defending)***(Reflect)


Spell name: Boost Rune
Element: N/A
Rank: 1
MP cost: 10MP
Effect: By writing the rune "Boost" on an object(Such as Tenjin's wooden sword) or a person, the rune increases one of their stats or their next spells power, speed or area damage.

Power:**
Speed:
Area:
Extra: *(Buff)*(Buff: Spellpower)


Last edited by Tenjin on Fri Oct 03, 2014 6:59 pm; edited 1 time in total

_________________
avatar
Tenjin
Council D
Council D

Posts : 22
Experience : 3
Primary Magic : Dark Écriture
Secondary Magic : N/A

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tenjin on Wed Oct 01, 2014 1:45 am

(Not sure if I did this right, but okay lol)

Bump!~

_________________
avatar
Tenjin
Council D
Council D

Posts : 22
Experience : 3
Primary Magic : Dark Écriture
Secondary Magic : N/A

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tatsuma on Thu Oct 02, 2014 11:19 am

yeah sorry it takes a bit some times for staff to get to these on occasion. Work gets in the way on occasion. So without further adieu let us begin this review.

sharp rune- my only qualms with this is that you'll need to put an entry in the holder section detailing her wooden sword's current stats pertaining to power, speed, durability, and range. Past that you're going to probably need to sacrifice one star for the "buff" extra since this is more or less a damage buff.

Honestly I'm not 1000% sure about it since I haven't run into spells like this before so congrats on doing something new :).


Pain rune- again this seems like a pretty well thought out spell, though again I'm not completely sure it qualifies on its own as an attack spell as much as a buff or added effect. That being said i'm seeing a pattern that probably would have placed this character better as a holder mage than as a caster. Also I'm not sure whether you're intending this spell to be non-lethal or not but you might clarify. Let's continue on though.

Fear Rune- This one I'm kind of iffy about. You'll need to specify the effects of the rune because otherwise this more or less falls under the category of "mind control magic" which is banned. As it stands, the way it is, I'm going to have to turn it down.

Teleportation rune- On this one it's pretty assuredly a no. Teleportation effects require the flash extra (or other variants if you wanted to make one) but it is a level 5 extra at the minimum. Also even at that point the effect bases itself on the power stat for how many times you can use it, the teleportation itself is a magically enhanced dodge with our system here, but the number of times you can dodge something is equal to power so I'm going to have to turn it down.

Boost rune- this as it stands wouldn't be so bad except that A.) It is a buff, B.) you would have to take the buff extra (and there is a separate extra for buffing spellpower) and C.) it would only buff one thing at a time for each time you took the extra for buffing. As this one stands it doesn't conform to our system at all.

All of that being said you can find the "extras" list in the magic creation sticky thread, and you are welcome to create your own extras as long as they have some semblance of balance for further approval. That being said you will need to rework most of these, just bum when you finish so I know to review.


_________________


avatar
Tatsuma
Fairy Tail B
Fairy Tail B

Posts : 585
Experience : 436
Primary Magic : Lightning Dragon Slayer
Secondary Magic : Void Magic
Age : 29

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tenjin on Thu Oct 02, 2014 4:34 pm

Tatsuma wrote:yeah sorry it takes a bit some times for staff to get to these on occasion. Work gets in the way on occasion. So without further adieu let us begin this review.

sharp rune- my only qualms with this is that you'll need to put an entry in the holder section detailing her wooden sword's current stats pertaining to power, speed, durability, and range. Past that you're going to probably need to sacrifice one star for the "buff" extra since this is more or less a damage buff.

Honestly I'm not 1000% sure about it since I haven't run into spells like this before so congrats on doing something new :).
Spoiler:
It's just a wooden sword though? I am unsure what you mean or how to go about doing this. This has no extra spell benefit, just the initial effect of the spell, so why the need to use a * elsewhere?


Pain rune- again this seems like a pretty well thought out spell, though again I'm not completely sure it qualifies on its own as an attack spell as much as a buff or added effect. That being said i'm seeing a pattern that probably would have placed this character better as a holder mage than as a caster. Also I'm not sure whether you're intending this spell to be non-lethal or not but you might clarify. Let's continue on though.
Spoiler:
The sword itself is used for the attacks, but the spell is what gives it the effectiveness. A holder magic would not make sense, because the use of my magic is using the wooden sword merely as a conduit for my spell. I could write these runs on my fingers for the same effect. This spell is not intended for lethal purposes, but a more powerful version could potentially kill someone through cardiac arrest.


Fear Rune- This one I'm kind of iffy about. You'll need to specify the effects of the rune because otherwise this more or less falls under the category of "mind control magic" which is banned. As it stands, the way it is, I'm going to have to turn it down.
Spoiler:
This isn't a mind control magic, this is like ghost pains. It's simple and requires each individual member to play fair and realistic, in no way does it control their mind.

Teleportation rune- On this one it's pretty assuredly a no. Teleportation effects require the flash extra (or other variants if you wanted to make one) but it is a level 5 extra at the minimum. Also even at that point the effect bases itself on the power stat for how many times you can use it, the teleportation itself is a magically enhanced dodge with our system here, but the number of times you can dodge something is equal to power so I'm going to have to turn it down.
Spoiler:
Then I guess I'll replace this one with a reflect spell.

Boost rune- this as it stands wouldn't be so bad except that A.) It is a buff, B.) you would have to take the buff extra (and there is a separate extra for buffing spellpower) and C.) it would only buff one thing at a time for each time you took the extra for buffing. As this one stands it doesn't conform to our system at all.
Spoiler:
I do not understand this, the effect of the spell is to buff, there is no "extra" And yes, of course it would only buff one thing at a time.

All of that being said you can find the "extras" list in the magic creation sticky thread, and you are welcome to create your own extras as long as they have some semblance of balance for further approval. That being said you will need to rework most of these, just bum when you finish so I know to review.
Spoiler:
I used the magic "extras" when making these spells, I am unsure of how you are meaning most of this- so I can't very well edit and bump to a more appropriate state.


_________________
avatar
Tenjin
Council D
Council D

Posts : 22
Experience : 3
Primary Magic : Dark Écriture
Secondary Magic : N/A

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tatsuma on Fri Oct 03, 2014 10:50 am

A wooden sword still falls under the category of weapons as wooden weapons can still be used to kill, ergo I would assume it needs. I'm double checking with the admins to make sure. Typically characters that use weapons are required to submit those weapons since they typically have stats such as Durability and range that quantify what they're capable of. Due to the fact I'm waiting on an answer about that let's move on for now.

Pain rune is more or less fine. However since you mentioned extras I will direct you to

Scroll to the "extra abilities" section"

The above hyperlink will take you to the magic creation rules which covers extra abilities for spells such as buffing, burning, blinding, non-lethal (this one is free for any spell though) etc. You'll want to use these for your spells since some of your spell effects use the extra abilities here that typically have to be purchased for the spell using the *'s available. I would say this probably requires the "enchantment" extra at the least.


----------------------------

Fear rune- still needs to be reworded at the very least to include what it does and also requires the purchase of the "enchantment" extra.

------------------------

Teleportation rune- you can replace this with a reflect spell, but keep in mind the "reflect" extra which I believe also requires the "defending" extra which more or less makes it a shield, although this is acceptable your spell would still follow the rules on shields so you'll want to scroll further down in the magic creation section for the entry on shields.

-----------------------

Boost rune- Yes I'm aware the effect of the spell is to buff, hence why would would need to take the "buff" extra from the magic creation section's list, though in order to increase spell power you would have to take the separate "buff:spell power" which allows you to buff the spell's power OR area OR speed by half of the number of *'s in power that you have invested in the spell. Like I had said earlier you can have it buff more than one but you would have to take the "Buff: spellpower" extra for each different one.


In addition you also might want to look at effects such as "lingering", "sustained", and "ranged" since your spells would only remain on the object you place them on for one post without lingering (which buys you one extra post per point invested in lingering) or sustained (Which would allow you to maintain the spell by paying half its mana cost again every post), or ranged which would be required to use them for range (although I often turn a blind eye to the need for that particular extra if the spell is attached to a throwable object like a throwing dagger or a rock).

Once you've gone back through the magic creation rules and edited you can bump for completion. I might also recommend looking at some of the spells that have already been approved in the "finalized magic" section to see the format that we typically have them in.

_________________


avatar
Tatsuma
Fairy Tail B
Fairy Tail B

Posts : 585
Experience : 436
Primary Magic : Lightning Dragon Slayer
Secondary Magic : Void Magic
Age : 29

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tenjin on Fri Oct 03, 2014 7:00 pm

Bump!

Let me know what you find out pertaining to the wooden sword & we'll work from there. Sorry for all the trouble.

_________________
avatar
Tenjin
Council D
Council D

Posts : 22
Experience : 3
Primary Magic : Dark Écriture
Secondary Magic : N/A

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tatsuma on Mon Oct 06, 2014 1:44 am

The consensus seems to be that the sword will be treated as unarmed strikes which means it does 20 wp worth of damage per strike. Everything else I said about your spells still stands though.

_________________


avatar
Tatsuma
Fairy Tail B
Fairy Tail B

Posts : 585
Experience : 436
Primary Magic : Lightning Dragon Slayer
Secondary Magic : Void Magic
Age : 29

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tenjin on Mon Oct 06, 2014 6:15 am

I edited my spells to match some of the approved spells I've seen.

_________________
avatar
Tenjin
Council D
Council D

Posts : 22
Experience : 3
Primary Magic : Dark Écriture
Secondary Magic : N/A

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tatsuma on Mon Oct 06, 2014 2:14 pm

Sharp Rune- Now looks fine, just remember piercing will only carry one point of the damage past the shield but it's still a nice spell.

Pain Rune- This spell looks fine although given the nature of how it works I might suggest using debuff for willpower instead of enchantment, though it's not really required or anything I just thought it might work in tandem with your other rune. I'll approve this as is though just offering some friendly tips.

Fear Rune- although there's nothing we have in the rules actually using people's stats as part of the spell, we probably should. I like this spell :) approved.

Reflect Rune- looks fine, just remember this technically classes as a shield and if the power of the spell you're trying to block is *** or higher it will shatter this spell and you'll still take 50% in damage, but will still reflect *** of damage. Also for spells 3 levels or more over this spell the shield will have absolutely no effect and no reflect. It looks fine, I just mention this to all of our newbies to help acclimate them with the system.


Boost Rune- This one is mostly fine although you will still need to specify which stat you're boosting. Some characters don't because they only ever buff one stat (such as agility/speed for me). That being said since we don't quite know what your style is yet we'll need you to specify which stats it boosts/buffs. Do also keep in mind that boosting spell effects such as area, speed, or power will only boost by half of this spell's power rating.


Once you specify the stats affected for boost you're ready for approval, you can also take this time to make any last minute changes or throw forth any other ideas that you might have. after that you're good to go :)

_________________


avatar
Tatsuma
Fairy Tail B
Fairy Tail B

Posts : 585
Experience : 436
Primary Magic : Lightning Dragon Slayer
Secondary Magic : Void Magic
Age : 29

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tenjin on Mon Oct 06, 2014 8:19 pm

I made Boost Rune unspecific because I intend it to be a global buff spell, to fit my physical or magical needs as I see fit. So, it could buff my speed, Power, Toughness... or it could boot my spellpower of my next spell.

_________________
avatar
Tenjin
Council D
Council D

Posts : 22
Experience : 3
Primary Magic : Dark Écriture
Secondary Magic : N/A

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tatsuma on Mon Oct 06, 2014 10:01 pm

Negative ghost writer, buffs are specific to each spell so again I say you'll need to select which stats they affect

_________________


avatar
Tatsuma
Fairy Tail B
Fairy Tail B

Posts : 585
Experience : 436
Primary Magic : Lightning Dragon Slayer
Secondary Magic : Void Magic
Age : 29

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tenjin on Tue Oct 07, 2014 1:34 am

Ah, if that is the case, then that spell does not need both the "Buff" & "Spellpower buff" does it?

_________________
avatar
Tenjin
Council D
Council D

Posts : 22
Experience : 3
Primary Magic : Dark Écriture
Secondary Magic : N/A

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tatsuma on Tue Oct 07, 2014 6:18 am

Normally taking buff twice would allow the spell to buff two stats at once so technically with buff and buff spellpower you could buff a stat and a spell attribute. But I'm being informed you can apply it to whatever so if you're done I can approve you

_________________


avatar
Tatsuma
Fairy Tail B
Fairy Tail B

Posts : 585
Experience : 436
Primary Magic : Lightning Dragon Slayer
Secondary Magic : Void Magic
Age : 29

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tenjin on Tue Oct 07, 2014 6:24 am

Yep, I'm done :)

_________________
avatar
Tenjin
Council D
Council D

Posts : 22
Experience : 3
Primary Magic : Dark Écriture
Secondary Magic : N/A

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Tatsuma on Tue Oct 07, 2014 6:28 am

Then approved for level 1

_________________


avatar
Tatsuma
Fairy Tail B
Fairy Tail B

Posts : 585
Experience : 436
Primary Magic : Lightning Dragon Slayer
Secondary Magic : Void Magic
Age : 29

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Dark Écriture(Done)

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum