Cold Hearts

"No one," Kotone shook her head, at first refusing to talk about it. But then, it wasn't often she was around someone she enjoyed the company of enough to not try and chase them off, she supposed. "Well, a little girl primarily. I uh... promised to take care of her if something happened to her father." Kotone sounded like she didn't enjoy the idea at all. She didn't. Scarlet was a very cute child, whom she would honestly like to see again, but the idea of that idiot getting himself hurt for a 'retirement plan' made her blood boil.

"And no offense, but you sort of remind me of a kid. I can't quite say why. That's about it." Well, not being able to say why was a lie. But Kotone had no desire to make Ren feel bad. She already seemed to lack self-confidence, something Kotone had in abundance.

She shifted the box slightly as Sid mewed again. He was positively soaking up the girl's attention. Probably another reason Kotone liked her. Sid was a good judge of character when food wasn't involved.

“Oh,” Ren said with a small nod. At first Kotone deflected. That wasn’t surprising. People did that when they didn’t want to talk about something. Ren did it, although she was far less convincing. When Kotone spoke she had a certain level of personal confidence. She seemed to at least believe the words coming out of her mouth, whether or not they were accurate. Ren sounded like she was second-guessing herself, even when she wasn’t…. quite. However in the end Kotone recanted her statement enough to mention a little girl. “That would be really sad…” Ren said quietly, adding to her earlier “oh.”

Next Kotone said that Ren reminded her of a child, and Ren blushed. “Um… okay…. I….” she took a deep breath, exhaled, and spoke again, trying to sound a bit more sure of herself, “I can understand.” She knew she acted a timid child. She was a timid child. Some people, when faced with all the terrors of the world, grew up quickly. Ren could take care of herself, when cornered, when crying, when alone on the street, she survived, it just didn’t translate into any sort of confidence or social maturity. It didn’t mean she was oblivious to how other people could view her.

“He’s very nice…” she said idly, thinking about how she must still seem like a little girl. Was that so bad? Kotone liked children anyway, right? Or maybe just cute ones. She blushed a bit more, any sort of positive qualifier for any judgment on Ren making her pleasantly embarrassed. “At least, um… you wouldn’t ever have to take care of me…” she said, her thoughts had clearly not left the earlier comment. Taking care of that girl if her father was gone. No worries there, for Ren anyway.

Kotone only nodded to Ren's statement about taking care of Scarlet. She didn't really want to think about it. The man hadn't seemed completely confident that he would be okay, despite promising not to leave Scarlet alone. Especially since after saying so he'd requested what he had of her. Of course it would be sad. Kotone had had enough of orphaned children. Not the children themselves... but the fact that people had to go through it.

At least she understood what Kotone was more or less saying. She must have heard it before... which she supposed wasn't exactly surprising. "Don't worry, it's only sort of. You're adult enough." Not everyone should have to grow up quickly. Kotone had. She'd never been allowed the luxury of being a proper kid. Which might explain why she could be so immature sometimes. Especially when she was angry.

Kotone chuckled at her comment about Sid being nice. "He is nice, but he's a brat too. I recently lost a sandwich to him." Of course, Hannah had distracted her by being nosy and infuriating. She looked at Ren when she said she wouldn't ever have to take care of her. "Not like a child, no. But if you ever needed help and I was around you could count on me. It's what I do." Which was true. Even if she had little in the way of social grace, she very much embodied the ideals of your stereotypical superhero. Fighting the bad guys and protecting innocent people like Ren. Not to mention she was too stubborn to know when to quit.

It was ironic to think that not everyone had to grow up, and that might be why Ren didn’t have to be grown up. She’d had to grow up, right? She had to, and yet she just did it wrong. That made sense right? “I am eighteen…” Ren offered quietly. She emphasized the middle word just slightly, as if to agree on some level that she was adult enough. Yes, her age was the enough. Her appearance was debatable as far as being adult or not. Her personality and confidence levels were clearly lacking in the usual adult qualities.

Kotone said that Sid was a brat, and Ren disagreed, but again, arguing was beyond her. “He has affection. It would be easy to be spoiled by affection,” she said thoughtfully, still petting the cat. As much as petting a cat was for the benefit of the cat, and not the person doing it, it did benefit Ren. He was soft, and she enjoyed making him a bit happier, and hearing Kotone chuckle meant she must be happy.

Next came the lie. Not a lie from Kotone though. Kotone said that if she was around, and Ren needed help, Kotone would help her. Sure she would. Maybe she would. She probably wouldn’t. Ren felt that insecurity, that fear, that distrust rising up in her throat. Sure, the woman hadn’t done anything that said she was going to go back on her word, but that didn’t mean much in Ren’s world, and so here came the lie. “I’m sure you would… so… thanks…” she added a small nod. Unfortunately, she probably wasn’t the most convincing liar. She wasn’t convincing telling the truth, and that was her saving grace as far as an actual lie. It just sounded so similar. However, she really didn’t want to dwell on that, “So.... you said you were a freelancer… do you know many guild wizards?”

"Eighteen, huh?" Kotone had guessed pretty closely, but still managed to be surprised when she told her. That made the timid girl a year older than Kotone, tho felt several years older. At least right now. Maybe not so much when she was angry and lashing out at people, but since she wasn't it wasn't really a factor. "I'm only seventeen. Guess I'm the kid then." kotone could be childish, but she was no kid. Not that she exactly saw herself as an adult either. She felt like a weird middle ground.

Of course, Ren sounded like she didn't believe Kotone when she said she'd help her out. But... that was fine. Who cared? Especially when it was entirely possible that the timid girl would never actually need help. How much trouble could she get into, aside from tripping and landing in a bad position, perhaps?

Ren took Kotone out of her train of thought though when she asked about her saying she was a freelancer. "No, no guild for me," Kotone told Ren. "I'm not exactly a 'pick a side and settle down' type of girl." That was kind of true, though the entire truth was that Kotone was afraid of committing to people in any way deep down. She could rescue them then run off into the night as much as she wanted, but actually joining a guild and having others truly depend on her, or worse, coming to depend on or become truly attached to them... Kotone couldn't handle it. Not after her experiences.

"Although, I do know quite a few guild wizards. Most of them are from Fairy Tail. I tend to attract their kind I suppose." By that she meant that her destructive tendencies drew Fairy Tail wizards to her, but she didn't elaborate, nor did she consider any other meanings behind what she'd said. "The amount of trouble I get in because I can't stay away from them..." She mumbled, remembering that it was Master Taiga's fault that she had stayed in town long enough to get caught by Eternal and his infernal request to make sure his daughter was safe.

Eighteen. Not very far into being eighteen, but yes, eighteen. She’d been living on her own for a lot longer than that, and been living in Lamia Scale for a while even, but overall she was just now an “adult,” and yet, she most certainly didn’t act like it. She knew her life, the factors of it, and the reasons she was how she was, to a point, and so when Kotone mentioned being younger, Ren didn’t feel bad. That’s adult enough, she thought, without anything said aloud.

It was no personal slight that Ren didn’t believe Kotone when she said she would help her. She had been very surprised that the stranger was carrying the crate for her for so long, but this was still different. It was different to say “hey, can I help with that?” and to say “I’ll be there if you need me.” She could only be convinced of so many unbelievable things, and that one fantasy was long since disproved as a whole.

“Neither am I,” she admitted, as far as picking a side. She wasn’t much for words, but she did offer a small explanation on that, “A guild wizard helped me, so I joined his guild.” No mention of saving a cat from a sewer, or that he’d helped her out of the sewer. Nope. That man was often away, doing his own thing, but Ren would be happy to actually see him sometime. Kotone went on to explain she knew a lot of Fairy Tail wizards, “I don’t know any,” she admitted quietly. She wanted to ask what kind of trouble, but that seemed personal, and she wouldn’t want Kotone to ask her certain questions. “Are they your friends?” she eventually decided to ask. That was a safe question. Not safe to Ren, but surely safe to everyone else.

Ren said she wasn't really the 'settling down' type either, or rather she agreed with Kotone. She explained that she joined because of some guy that had helped her. Which, she supposed was reasonable. Though that would never be good enough for the dragon slayer. She didn't need help. She helped others. Not that she voiced any of this this time. She did when she felt like she needed to defend her feelings.

"Are they your friends?" Ren asked in regards to the Fairy Tail members she knew. Kotone paused for a moment, though the pause was mental rather than physical, because she didn't stop walking. Friends. Roejaster was a likeable guy. Hannah she disliked for some reason even she didn't understand. Taiga... cared for her in a way that she didn't find insulting. "I don't really have friends," Kotone said in a quieter, more serious tone. The statement was for herself as much as Ren. To tag someone a friend meant she had to let them in. She didn't want to do that. "I mean, they're alright I suppose. But no."

When Kotone said this, she seemed to build up that wall a bit more. Like she was steeling herself for an onslaught of friends she would have to turn down or something. Thinking of things she didn't like to think about did tend to trigger those defense mechanisms she was so good at.

Ren was a terrified little girl who disliked the exchange of money, who was sure she would never measure up to any standard for anything. She was the embodiment of insecurity, but the was not stupid, and she knew that everyone needed help. She liked to help people, even when they didn’t really need the help. Sometimes, some people, she didn’t want to help, and some people were bad enough you didn’t want to think they deserved help, but they still needed it sometimes.

Kotone said that she didn’t really have friends. Ren, for some reason she couldn’t even explain, had a small burst of enthusiasm. Maybe it wasn’t a burst, and maybe it wasn’t really enthusiasm, but it was something. She had the urge to speak, despite Kotone’s quiet and serious tone. “Me either.” There. She said it. It didn’t even make sense. Why would she be positive sounding about something like that? It was simple. It was something that she could undeniably relate to Kotone about. It was something personal, albeit not positive, that she could actually share with someone, and it was rare to find anyone who she shared that with. “I mean… b-but… sorry,” she said, realizing it sounded bad.

Well, Ren seemed to get pretty excited at the fact that neither of them had friends. She was practically acting like they were instant friends because of it. Kotone supposed that in a weird sort of way it was almost comforting. Almost. But it was also weird. "Don't worry about it," she said with a slight amused grin. "No need to apologize for something that makes you happy. It's not like you're hurting anyone."

The seventeen year old finally had to stop for a moment and set the box down, wiping the sweat off of her forehead. Even with her strength it was a rather long haul back. "Hey, Ren..." Kotone looked at Ren for short moment before putting her hand behind her back. When she pulled it back out, she was holding a large snowflake made out of ice. "It won't last long, but you seem like the type who would appreciate something pretty."

Kotone tended to turn extra nice when around children, and with Ren reminding her of a childish person in the cuter sort of way, it brought out a bit more of her niceness. Around actual children, Kotone could actually seem to pull a 180 degree turn with her peronality. The reason being that she very strongly believed in keeping kids happy and safe to make up for her own lack of childhood.

Ren was used to being weird, it was nothing new. What was new was having someone be nice to her, and having someone relate to her. Weird or not, she almost never got that. Kotone said she didn’t need to apologize for something that made her happy and Ren looked over at her. Usually she was watching Sid, but for this she needed to look at the other woman, and her expression read as confusion. There were lots of things that seemed to contradict that, numerous memories, but she supposed Kotone was right, even if it didn’t feel right. “I suppose you’re right…”

Kotone stopped to put the box down and Ren felt guilty. Kotone was working so hard on Ren’s behalf, and they had just met. It wasn’t fair to her, and Ren wanted to make it up to her. The room was nothing, but carrying this crate was something. It was also possible Ren was very biased against herself in every interaction. She got quickly distracted when Kotone showed her a snowflake. She didn’t know where a snowflake had come from, but she supposed it must be part of Kotone’s magic, logically. She blushed at the idea she would appreciate something pretty, and tried to push back the sting of a memory. Your magic isn’t pretty. She smiled regardless of what she’d been told back then, and still believed, “Thanks… it is very pretty.”

“I can carry the crate some, if you would like…. Or we can just keep here,” she added, knowing if Kotone wanted a break, waiting was perfectly fine. It wasn’t as if the dark bothered Ren.

The dragon slayer shook her head. Sure, playing manual labor girl wasn't exactly her style, but even she gave in and played nice sometimes. "I said I'd carry the box, didn't I?" She reminded Ren, stretching before picking the box back up. "I'll be fine, Ren. Don't worry. Besides you can consider it thanks for the free room." The box was decently heavy. Especially with such a long walk. Ren might have used her magic or something to do it before, because Kotone doubted the small girl had the same strength she did. Girls her size rarely did. Kotone suspected it had something to do with her dragon slayer magic, but didn't really question it. She just enjoyed it. Especially when she got to use it on someone who was being a jerk or criminal.

"I might like the occasional free thing but I'd feel pretty bad taking advantage of your hospitality if I also made you do the work. Contrary to what *some* people think I do, in fact, have feelings. And some of them aren't angry," Kotone grinned, if only slightly, as she said this. She was aware of how she acted, even if she didn't always know why. Nor was she particularly inclined to change it. Life was working out fine for her these days anyway.

Ren sighed, not wanting to make Kotone keep working on her behalf, but she just couldn’t argue. Arguments implied the presence of a backbone, and that simply was not true of Ren. So she had sighed, and then with a small pause she said, “Alright, thank you.” The room really isn’t that big of a deal… but thank you.

Ren would normally have used her Shadow Hand as a sort of casing for her arms, buffering the pressure between the crate and herself so that she could hold it. She was definitely not extremely strong. Ren was a fragile little girl, tiny and underweight and afraid of socializing. Strong just wasn’t the word. Kotone seemed to be strong in all sorts of respects, and Ren wasn’t jealous of that, but she did respect it.

She looked curious again, “Of course you have feelings. That’s ignorant to think otherwise… you’re very kind, and you don’t even know me…. It was not a common occurrence for her. She would not have been at all surprised by Kotone coming by, laughing at her, poking a bit of fun, and leaving. That she was still here, doing all this work was amazing. It was hard to imagine people thinking she was anything else but kind, even if Ren had seen the glimpses of aggression toward the beginning. She looked back to Sid, quietly mumbling, “I wish I was good at helping people…”

Kotone's exceptional hearing meant that she had no trouble hearing Ren's mumbling. It was a gift and a curse sometimes, but the dragon slayer would feel blind, deaf, and completely out of touch with the world if she didn't have access to the enhanced senses her magic and upbringing had brought her. "You're offering me a room, aren't you? That's helping people too. You don't have to run around playing hero like I do to help people." She didn't sound upset or angry or anything, but she did have that tone that said she was making a point. Probably because she was. "If everyone did what I did then I wouldn't need to do what I do." Get into fights with criminals and jerks and destroy half of a marketplace to prevent one thief from stealing an apple. That sort of thing happened.

Kotone wondered how far the guild hall was from here. They'd been walking for awhile, and she'd never actually visited Lamia Scale. Unlike Fairy Tail, you had to go out of your way to get to it. That meant unless you wanted something to do with the guild, you generally didn't go near it. Part of her thought that sounded nice and secluded. Kotone could respect secluded.

It surprised and unsettled Ren to have Kotone replying to her mumbling. She hadn’t said it for anyone else to hear. She had half been speaking to herself, and half speaking to Sid as if talking to the cat would offer some comfort. She suddenly felt anxious and as if her thoughts had been spied on, despite the fact that she had actually spoken aloud, and thus couldn’t really complain at Kotone hearing her. If she knew more about dragon slayers she would realize the implications of any she met having those senses. It would make the poor girl far more anxious, but luckily she was just distracted by Kotone’s comment.

“Um, okay…” she said, shrinking socially again. Back to her shell. Like she had been creeping out of her darkness inch by inch and a giant spotlight had been thrown on her, so she scrambled back to the shadows. It was perhaps to cliché for her due to her magic, but it was no less accurate.

Ren nodded without a word when Kotone said that if everyone did what she did, it would become unnecessary. She understood, she did, but it wasn’t what she had meant. She didn’t consider offering a mostly empty room for a night, to someone already there, who had carried a large and heavy object for her to be anything special. She didn’t need to be a superhero, but she felt inept most of the time anyway. In fact, Kotone was helping Ren with a task that Ren had agreed to do to help someone, that made her even farther removed from actually being helpful. She felt useless, but she wasn’t going to say that out loud.

Kotone let out an audible sigh when Ren shrank back into her shell. She could practically feel it happening. And for once she found it frustrating. It wasn't Ren's fault, but it was still like being punished for trying to comfort her. Kotone wasn't even fully aware that she shouldn't have heard what she did. She probably would have apologized if she ever did anything like that.

But she didn't. "Nevermind..." came her slightly frustrated answer. This was exactly what happened when she let herself get friendly with people. They sprang unfair requests on her or they were intimidated when she didn't want them to be or... whatever. She should really stop trying.

Kotone also knew on some level that she was being a bit unreasonable, but her feelings hardly cared what she knew. But she also knew she needed to get ahold of herself before one of them lost Ren's room for the night. And with Ren's personality she doubted it would be her. The only problem is... since she didn't apologize for things... she had no idea what to say. She glanced at Ren, her frustration turned to concern, and it showed slightly on her face. "What's wrong?" she asked, doing her best to sound nice despite her frustration.

Ren’s shrinking wasn’t really subtle. Most of her insecurities were blaringly obvious. She was being eaten by her thick and oversized hoodie. She was the picture of insecurity, and her body language drove it home right now. Just like Kotone’s anger, that Ren had luckily not witnessed yet, was obvious. She didn’t mean to make Kotone feel punished, and she didn’t mean to frustrate the woman. Unfortunately knowing that probably would have served to make Ren shrink still more. She did not have strong willpower.

It came as a slight blow when Kotone said nevermind. Her tone was different. Less gentle and almost protective. This was displeased, and Ren chewed on her bottom lip a little. Stupid…. Stupid…. Stupid… Ren repeated that in her head, upset at what she’d said. She shouldn’t have spoken up at all. At all. Speaking up caused problems. She should just shut up and go home and curl up in bed and never come out. Unfortunately she was sharing her bed tonight, so that was really not applicable. “I’m sorry…” she said quietly.

Surprisingly Kotone asked Ren what was wrong, and she looked nice again. She was still tempted to pull her hood up and hide, but her shoulders relaxed just slightly instead. She really hated to talk about her insecurities, her past, really any of her issues, but she felt badly for upsetting Kotone in the first place, so she had to say something, “I j-just…. I d-don’t really talk to people, and I mess everything up, a-and Kade asked me to get the crate, and you’re doing it for me, and then talking like I’m doing just as much for you, but really I’m not good at anything a-and I wasn’t expecting you to hear me and it startled me…. I guess…. I think…”

"Stop apologizing," Kotone said gently, shaking her head. It sounded like she was doing more harm than good being a good person. At least to the girl's self-esteem. "You didn't mess anything up, you know. You tripped and I thought you might like some assistance. It's not like I was trying to say you failed at anything."

Kotone let out a small sigh again, her breath making a cloud in the cold winter air. She grinned at Ren again, managing to calm herself down some. She still thought it was stupid to keep trying but she wanted to all the same. She enjoyed making idiots and jerks cry, not helpless girls. "I do have good hearing. It's easy to forget other people don't. I'll try to ignore it so you and Sid can talk privately if it would make you feel better."

Kotone was debating what to do at this point. She stopped suddenly, setting the box down. "Why don't you carry it for a bit then? You said you'd go get it so I'll let you carry it the rest of the way." It was an attempt to make her feel better about getting put out of a job. She had no idea if it would work, but maybe it would give her a small confidence boost. "It really is a job for two anyway, as heavy as this box is."

Kotone’s gentle was Ren’s run-and-hide signal. It didn’t really impact her self-esteem though, not in a lasting way. She was used to this kind of thing. “I trip all the time,” she said, more as a fact than as a put down. It really was true, she was a clumsy mess sometimes. When Kotone mentioned her good hearing Ren let out a rather large sigh. Not at the hearing part, but at pretending. “Pretending doesn’t help… doesn’t make any sense to just…. Act. I just won’t mumble, its fine.” That was borderline argumentative, or at least it was a disagreement, but she simply didn’t see the point in pretending not to hear someone. How did that make them more secure? Wrapped up in a blanket of self-delusion, and you’d still be cold at night.

Soon enough Kotone stopped. That was surprising. The crate was set down and she asked if Ren wanted to carry it. Ren didn’t really want to do manual labor, but she did want to be useful, and she wanted to do things for Kotone. She ended up smiling at this and nodding. “Absolutely.”

She lifted Sid up and put him in the sort of pouch that her hood made when it wasn’t covering her head. He could of course be removed, but she didn’t want to just put him down. Her shadow shrunk some, not that it was all that visible, as she moved some of it into the sleeves of her hoodie and reached down to lift the crate. She couldn’t feel much of the weight this way, and felt comfortable with the idea of carrying it for a while, “See? I’ll be okay…. And now I’m a train,” she said, laughing just a little at having Sid in her hood. She was oddly happy all of a sudden, maybe another one of her childish traits.

Ren protested to Kotone's suggestion of ignoring Ren's mumbling. Kotone actually found herself fine with this, and respected that she didn't want to pretend when she knew better. Plus she could actually disagree with Kotone, even if it wasn't over much of an issue. A hint of a spine meant maybe she'd figure out how to use hers one day. The brunette girl wondered what that would look like if it were true. What she didn't do was say anything about it. It might crush that small glimmer of strength she was showing.

At least her attempt to give Ren a chance to feel useful was working. The girl suddenly seemed very happy to be lifting the crate. And Kotone's arms were getting tired, so it worked out. Then Ren said she was a train, and at that moment Kotone remembered she was younger than Ren, and couldn't help but laugh. Not at Ren, but certainly in amusement. "Sid's an experienced conductor. You're in good hands, I'm sure." Sid mewed in agreement. As far as Kotone was concerned, Sid totally knew what was going on and was smug about the fact that no one else could understand him. He was a devious little cat. She'd seen it multiple times since he was a kitten.

Kotone had her own childish side, mostly involving childish activities, and it looked fun to be  part of the train, so she moved up behind Ren and started walking a few paces away. She wasn't going to make it obvious that was what she was doing... but she couldn't resist all the same. Probably because she didn't feel all defensive around Ren, at least for the most part.

A hint of a spine was still more than Ren usually showed. It helped when the people around her were actively trying not to push her around or manipulate her. Kotone was trying to help, and Ren wasn’t exactly sure what to do about that. Even with good intentions around, it wasn’t like Ren was fixing her entire personality right there.

When Ren said she was a train, she’d laughed slightly. When Kotone laughed, Ren laughed a little more. It was nice, and happy. “Well I hope I can be one of the best trains then,” she said with a pleased look. Certainly walking around with a cat in her hood looked odd, and certainly she wasn’t a real train, but she could go along with it. She couldn’t see the ground in front of the crate, so she decided to look more at Kotone while they were walking.

While watching Kotone she remembered something she was curious about. “So you’re in the area… what were you thinking of doing tomorrow?” Goodness knows Ren wasn’t going to try to get involved, but she was curious. If Kotone spent most of her time knowing Fairy Tail members, she wasn’t likely to be in Lamia Scale territory. And yet here she was, and she hadn’t even found a place to stay before she ran into Ren. That might imply that she had something important to do, and had rushed over, but Kotone wasn’t giving off that vibe.

"Honestly," Kotone replied after a very short pause. She'd had fun playing secret caboose for a moment, but her need to act less childish in front of people took over when Ren spoke up again, and she fell back slightly behind and beside her. She shook her head, a slight grin on her face. She had to admit she was having some fun with Ren. They were great not friends together when Kotone wasn't accidentally turning her into a blob of scared eighteen year old. "I don't have plans. I wander until I find someone that needs some heroing done and I do that. Then I move on."

Kotone was a free spirit, and that was the second and more obvious reason she hadn't joined a guild. She certainly liked Fairy Tail enough secretly, though even she wasn't aware of that. "Sometimes I hang around awhile and sometimes I don't..." She had to admit, she missed the place she actually called home back in Hosenka town. Maybe she should visit there again soon. Mostly it was an old woman's tiny spare rental house she'd been allowed to keep as a heroing gift, and it was filled with plushy cats. She tended to buy those whenever she saw them... then kept it a secret from literally everyone but Sid.

Ren enjoyed acting childish. She was mature enough, but children were both less judgmental, and less judged. Oh, they’d been quite an issue for her in her youth, but when she got involved with adults, she knew that they were more judgmental. Everyone wanted to say that kids could be mean, but they only judged on what they knew. They judged on what they saw. Adults went looking for problems, and they cut deeper.

“So hero…ing… that is kind of your job? Or maybe your calling?” she asked curiously. Even in a guild Ren didn’t feel she had either a calling or a job. She wasn’t a free spirit, but she was just around. She wanted to reach a point where she felt comfortable, and maybe then she would have actual goals. IT was hard to have goals when you were afraid to open up to anyone. Even people who had done you no harm ever.

“Well, it sounds like you have good reason to travel,” Ren added. She could have said something about hanging out. Or something about how Kotone could stop in when she was around, or maybe that Ren enjoyed her company. Rational comments. Realistic comments. Unfortunately this was Ren, and so she left it at that.

Kotone chuckled at Ren's words about heroing being her calling or job, grinning and looking at the girl as she stuck her hands in her pockets as she often did when she was idle. "I guess you could say that, yeah. I get I can be prideful and cause some problems, myself, but overall I wouldn't feel right not doing as dad taught me. People need protected so they can live and make their own choices and whatnot. At least that's what dad said."

Kotone didn't often ramble about her adoptive dragon father, but she felt like it this time. Her father often set her emotions on a more serious and sad path. Or more correctly an angry path because she didn't do sad, and instead got angry at him for leaving all over again. She took a deep breath though, not wanting to make Ren drop the box and run for cover. She would probably trip over the crate when she did and panic or something.

"Anyway, yeah. I've got a good reason to wander, but not exactly a schedule to keep unless I hear of something specific," she decided with a shrug. She didn't exactly know why Ren was inquiring. She hardly seemed like she was wanting to do anything with Kotone, as far as she could tell...

Ren tripping over the crate was likely. Panic, maybe a bit less likely. Admittedly that wasn’t saying much. She fell over things all the time. Mostly she tripped on nothing, because there was a lot of nothing to trip on. It was a nuisance to be sure. She didn’t think people like Kotone would understand that. People with balance and proper working legs. Confidence to boot. Actually Ren didn’t fully understand it, so she certainly didn’t expect anyone else to.

She kept talking about her Dad. Ren’s mind did not work that way. She didn’t think of dragons as parents. Sure, she knew that it was how it could work, but she didn’t really understand. She knew her father. He was… well, she didn’t know where. She didn’t want to think about it.

“That’s nice,” Ren said thoughtfully. She was a bit distracted, hastily pushing back thoughts of her father, but she really did think it was nice, “The epitome of freedom… right? I could travel and all that, but I wouldn’t like it. Its so… cold and scary. Not knowing where you’ll be…. Being alone…” she looked at the crate sadly, “Self-imposed restraint I guess… but its not like I have anything out there better. No one wants me around anyway.” It was unfortunately exactly how she felt, “But… its good… I mean, when… you are around, because you’re good for people. And you’re nice and stuff.” She blushed and kept staring at the box, this time for embarrassment reasons.

"Well, I can't get cold," Kotone answered Ren with a shrug. "And I usually prefer solitude to people. People ususally annoy me. You don't, but most of them do. I guess you're one of the lucky ones." Kotone walked for a few more seconds in silence, her hands stuffed in her pockets. "I'm not that nice though, Ren. I'm sure if I stuck around long enough you'd probably dislike me too," she decided slightly bitterly. Sure, she pushed people away on purpose, but she did get tired of either pushing people away, or leaving when they refused to do as she wanted and go.

Kotone was silent for a bit after that. Apparently she was still angry about everything that had happened in Magnolia. everything had worked out fine. Normal people would probably have said they had a great time. She'd ended on a good note with Hannah despite disliking her for her interest in Roejaster. She'd stopped a dark guild. She'd even been able to punish a corrupt  Magic Council guard captain while she was there. In addition to other things. Her hand went to her necklace she was wearing in addition to her normal leather choker. It reminded her of Scarlet again, and the promise she'd made. That was the real reason she was upset. She'd gotten close to the little girl... or as close as you could to a child in one afternoon... and her father now thought it was an excuse to do something dangerous. She couldn't get close to people if she made them reckless as well. She was one thing... people with loved ones they needed to stick around for were another thing entirely.

Ren made a face when Kotone said she couldn’t get cold. Maybe something contemplative. She would be lucky if she couldn’t’ get cold. “That’s lucky though,” she told the woman quietly. However Kotone was arguing now. That she wasn’t nice, and that most people, unlike Ren, annoyed Kotone. Ren chewed on her lip, continuing until it was starting to hurt. ‘I’m sure if I stuck around long enough you’d probably dislike me too.’

“… Nu-uh….” she said, disagreeing. It didn’t sound especially convincing, because Ren rarely had confidence behind her words, but she was sure she wouldn’t. “I never get tired of people. They just go away… ‘Cause I’m not…. Good enough, I guess. But its alright, I guess, I mean, at least I have a place to stay now. I don’t need… I mean, I’ll be f-fine. But if you th-think I’ll leave, you should spend more time with me, and I can show you I wouldn’t. I mean if you wanted, its your choice…” she mumbled a bit at the end, getting awkward. It was really difficult to disagree, especially with someone with such a strong personality.

Ren had no way of knowing what Kotone was thinking. She would have felt awful interrupting the girl’s thoughts. In fact, she already felt awful for what she’d said. It was too much. Too disagreeable. Too telling. She should have just shut up. She stared at the crate harder, her hooding pulled up by her shadow, so it could cover her face. She was basically walking blind, but then again, that usually worked out better.

Kotone blinked a few times, her hand not moving from the necklace she'd been touching. Was... Ren asking to hang out with her some more? Kotone  hadn't expected that. Why would she? People that weren't Roejaster didn't do that. And he had a new girlfriend as far as Kotone could tell. She looked at Ren questioningly. "You're... asking me to hang out with you more then?" she asked, sounding surprised. Her hand fell from her necklace down to her side, and for a short moment she acted slightly awkward, like she wasn't used to people who weren't very specific people being nice to her. She was convinced people like Roejaster and Taiga felt sorry for her more than anything else, even if she did enjoy their company.

After a moment, she nodded, a grin crossing her face. "Sure, if that's what you'd like... I mean, it could be fun. Not that I know what to do. I don't exactly... just do stuff like that normally." It was Kotone's turn to be embarrassed. She was extremely confident... unless it came to people.Being social and friendly with them, that is. She normally pushed them away, if they didn't outright dislike her anyway. "What would... what do you have in mind?"

Ren didn’t mean to ask to hang out. Honestly, she didn’t mean to say much of anything. It was much better if she had just stayed home. Nope. No. She couldn’t even accept that. Even Ren knew that getting out and meeting someone nice as Kotone mattered. Maybe she would change her mind if she ran off the super sweet girl, but hopefully not.

Kotone seemed reasonably awkward. She asked if Ren asked to hang out, “Uh, I g-guess…” she said. If she disagreed, she might offend Kotone. Surprisingly Kotone actually smiled. Ren couldn’t see her, but she could tell the change in her tone. That was confusing. Was this conversation actually going well? Since when did that happen?

So while Kotone was acting a bit strange, Ren was trying to think of what she actually liked to do. “Well… I like dancing… watching it. I’m too clumsy to do it myself…” she added the last part quieter. “Um, but I like helping people, and…. Walking. I could just travel with you someplace. K-keep you company. I could come back on my own, that would be fine,” she suggested, sounding a bit more eager. She knew Kotone travelled a lot. She could use company, right? Unless she liked being alone, which she had already said. “I mean, if you didn’t mind.” She didn’t even consider that Ren going so far out of her way would seem odd. It wasn’t odd for Ren to do things for people. She could travel anywhere. Just… not Era.